A Dialogue: Truth and Reconciliation

Guest Writers: Thérèse Niquay & Michel Duval

Thérèse Niquay is the Director of Community Services and Projects, Atikamekw Community of Manawan.

 Michel Duval is a pediatric hematologist-oncologist, researcher in immunotherapy and partnerships with patients and families at CHU Sainte-Justine. Michel is a Co-Lead of the Knowledge Mobilization Group and a member of the Senior Leadership Committee at ACCESS.

 

Michel: Thérèse, “Truth and Reconciliation,” I don’t know where to start. It’s not easy. It’s difficult even to think about what happened.

Thérèse: All I can do is tell you what we went through.

I was six when I left for the first time. At that age, I didn’t realize where I was being taken. I saw my older brothers and sisters, who had already been to the boarding school, getting ready. Our parents prepared us for our departure, which took place every year in September. I was excited to see that I had new clothes and that I was going away. I thought I was just going to have fun.

Early in the morning, very early, we were woken up, got dressed, and taken by canoe to the other side of the river where we would catch the bus that would take us to the boarding school. I saw the bus and was excited. I thought to myself, I’m going on a trip. I’m going to have fun.

But I saw other children crying, especially one of my older brothers who had already been to the residential school, and he was crying. I wondered why he was crying when I was so excited to go. But once we left, the bus was on forest roads, and we weren’t even halfway there when I was already bored and crying.

Once we arrived at our destination, I remember often asking one of my older sisters how many times we would have to sleep there before we could go home. I guess time passed, and then I resigned myself to my fate. I don’t remember when I stopped asking when we were going home. But it was boring… Looking back on everything I went through, everything we went through during those ten years, I can say that little by little it was like death in our souls, something died inside us.

The break with our parents, the break with the whole family, it was only years later that I realized how much it had affected us. It was like being uprooted. We became strangers to ourselves, strangers to our parents, to our families. At an age when you need to know where you come from and where you’re going, we were like uprooted children, lost.

It was a long journey to find our identity, a long quest to find ourselves back.

Some were taken when they were four or five. I know a woman who was four when she left. Today, she’s really struggling with health issues, including fibromyalgia, lupus, and other health problems. I link this to trauma, among other things. But she’s very strong. She always has challenges to overcome. She takes part in canoe expeditions and other activities. And I think that’s a way for her to rediscover all the strength she has inside.

When we talk about truth and reconciliation, we need to realize how much effort it takes for people who have lived through residential schools to heal and be reborn.

And our parents, whom we have also seen transformed. It’s only later that we realize it. All the harm did to them by taking their children away. It’s their entire dignity as parents. They were deeply hurt. We also saw our parents sink into alcoholism. While we were already experiencing the distress we were going through, seeing our parents in that state was very difficult. Even today, we still bear the scars of all that. That’s why it’s still relevant to talk about truth and reconciliation.

Because the whole truth has not yet been fully grasped and understood. For me, I find that talking about it and knowing that there are people who want to know, who want to understand what we’ve been through, is also part of our healing.

Michel: How can we, who are not Atikamekw, not Indigenous, how can we help, how can we move in the right direction with you?

Thérèse: Just by being open and welcoming and learning about the history of Indigenous people and Indigenous families. Above all, by recognizing that, yes, something has been broken, but that somewhere, something remains intact. It’s the sacred dimension within, that knowledge, which is now resurfacing.

It’s about accompanying us in this resurgence of Indigenous peoples.

I think we really need to know about the richness of Indigenous peoples, what can help rebuild the world. Because in general, around the world, things are not going well.

Because there is still a force today that we must counter: those who want to have everything, who want to seize all power in order to alienate other peoples. And the First Nations have proven that we can always be reborn and take back our place to build a better world together.

Michel: I believe it’s possible. Two by two here, two by two there, quietly. Since I’ve known you, I’ve been impressed by what you can bring to the rest of the world like us, who have a completely different vision.

Thérèse: I’m also proud to see that there are First Nations people working in the medical field, in different professions, whether in nursing, medicine, or surgery. It’s a source of pride because, having known my grandmother as a midwife and medicine woman, with all the knowledge she had, I pay tribute to these people who have entered the medical profession while also seeking to remain rooted in our ancestral knowledge.

Michel: It’s truth, reconciliation, and even collaboration.

Thérèse: Working together for a better world. I really appreciate the connection that people like you are making with us, the First Nations.

Michel: You know, it brings a lot to us too…. Thérèse, I’m so happy to have met you.

Thérèse: Me too, I like all the people I meet, because it’s first and foremost a connection of the heart, of the soul.

Michel: Now, I’m moved, I don’t know what to say.

Thérèse: Well, we’re going to have a good journey together. Yes, we’re going to have a good journey together. Truth, Reconciliation.